It’s True

Can you imagine how much easier it would be to get a sale, or at least an appointment, with someone that knows you by name as compared to that busy guy who’s meeting you just interrupted? Not to bust on cold calls because sometimes that’s the ONLY way you’ll get in touch with someone, but if you can get around the “cold” part, the call is much easier.

You’ve heard the saying, “It’s not WHAT you know, but WHO you know that counts.”

I say, “It’s not who YOU KNOW, it’s WHO KNOWS YOU that counts.”

There are a million ways to get known, but these 3 are the most effective.

1. Networking Events

One problem with a networking event is that everyone is there to sell something and they’re not necessarily looking to buy anything. You can use this to your advantage by being genuinely interested in what it is they are trying to sell and who they are as a person. When you are done speaking with someone at a networking event, the rule of thumb is the more you know about their products, their family, and their life, the better. The reasoning behind this thought process is that people love to talk about themselves, and the more you know about them, the more you let them talk. They will remember you as a great conversationalist.

2. Business Events

The difference with this and a networking event is that everyone at this function will have something to do with your business. This could be a trade show, trade association lunch, or the like. The goal here is to either garner a piece of information before the event with which you can provide value to those you come in contact with or search out people of whom you can ask for wisdom and advice or ask about experiences and expertise. Again, people love to talk about themselves or their knowledge and they love to get a piece of info that will help them in their endeavors. “what are your thoughts on…,” “How has…affected your line of work?” and “Have you had any experience with…” are the best kind of questions for this situation.

3. The Golf Course, Social Events, or Restaurants

The key here is to keep it light. I wouldn’t say avoid business talk, but I would encourage you to try to take a different approach. Just try to make a friend, even if it’s only for a few minutes. Be yourself, and if you feel like to need to be someone else in order to make connections, maybe you should change yourself.

If you’re really trying to make a connection, offer your business card and this can open up the door for a business conversation. Generally you will be offered a business card back. You’ll find that the high-level people tend not to have cards on hand. That’s okay. Always give a card, even when engaged in friendly and social conversation, and even if you know you won’t get one in return.

Friendly Business

The bottom line is that no matter what the situation or circumstance, people want to do business with their friends. If someone sees you as a friend and a valuable relationship, they are more likely to do business with you, regardless of price (to a point).

When making connections, nothing beats humor. If you’re not humorous, you can learn to be and I’ll cover that next time.

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About 2 weeks ago, I shared with you my thought process behind Why I Talk To Everyone. Well, here’s another story to illustrate the benefits of being friendly everywhere you go!

So, 2 weeks into the ownership of my new computer, I get a virus. Not a little “pop up” virus, but an “eat your computer from the inside out” virus. I took my computer to The Geek Squad at Best Buy and stood in line for about 20-30 minutes waiting on Anthony to help the other customers who were obviously livid about their situations and taking it out on him.

I approach the desk when it is my turn with a big smile on my face. Throughout my interaction with Anthony, I made sure to be pleasant and ask him about his work and genuinely be interested in him. Well, he let me know that it will be ten days to get my computer done. That sucks, but I know nothing about computers so I had no choice. I said “no problem, thank” and left it at that.

Wouldn’t you know it, 2 hours later, I get a phone call. Anthony says hello and proceeds to tell me how much he appreciated that I was patient and that he went ahead and finished my computer this morning! So I went from 10 days to 2 hours just like that!

That, my friends, is one selfish reason why you should talk to everyone.

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Those of you who read my earlier post Why I Talk to Everyone will remember that I said that I was going to write more in depth about making connections and forming mini relationships quickly. Most people think that some people are born with the ability to meet people and make new friends and that some aren’t. I believe that to a point, in that some people have a natural inclination towards social exchanges and some do not, but I also believe that successful social exchanges take a learned skill.

You have all heard the saying, “It’s not what you know, but WHO you know that counts.” This couldn’t be more true than in an entrepreneur’s world. Malcolm Gladwell speaks to this idea in his book, The Tipping Point. He says, “Acquaintances (not good friends) represent a source of social power, and the more acquaintances you have the more powerful you are.” He discounts the importance of your best friends in serving business needs by saying that they occupy the same spheres of influence that you are do. “Weak ties,” on the other hand, allow you access to social groups, business contacts, and opportunities (not to mention dates) that you never would have had with your group of close friends.

Now you know why it is in your best interest to be friendly and make friends and contacts wherever you go, and I’d like to give you some practical ideas of how to combat your fears in these types of situations. First, take action. Action Cures Fear! If you are terrified of starting conversations with people, then go out right now and say….something, anything. It doesn’t matter how you start, just say something. Sometimes people will grunt at you so you just move along, and sometimes you’ll meet people who just open up.

The best way I’ve found to break the ice is to ask them about something they own, be it the watch on the wrist or the car they are driving. Everyone like to talk about themselves and their stuff. Get people talking about themselves and they’ll love you! Once you’re in conversation, it’s pretty easy to transition with questions like, “do you work around here?” or “what do you do for a living?” or something along those lines. You never know when you’ll meet your next business partner, customer, or best friend!

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I have made it a habit of being friendly to everyone I come in contact with on a daily basis, and I think you should as well. It’s not the most comfortable thing in the world to start a conversation with a total stranger, but if you don’t, you will potentially miss 100’s or even 1000’s of opportunities. Plus, once you get over your fear and just do it, you’ll have a great time making connections and building relationships with people all over town! I’ll get into this topic more in another post, but I thought I’d tell you about two recent conversations I had that may turn into something more!

First, I was at lunch with my dad yesterday when he saw an old friend and started chatting. So I, not wanting to stand there idly, started speaking with his wife, who I knew to be somewhat of an entrepreneur. We immediately hit it off and were engrossed in a business discussion when she mentioned her next idea for a venture. I won’t get into the details of it at this point, but I believe I may have found my next business partner! Just because I decided to be friendly. This also give me the opportunity to get into an industry and a niche that I never would have gotten into before.

Second, last night, when I was at Twist getting desert with my wife and some of our best friends, I noticed the man at the next table wearing a Breitling watch, the EXACT watch that I want. As you can imagine, I was a bit nervous to talk to this guy who looked to be mid to late thirties, was spending $300+ on dinner (I’ve never seen 4 people with so much sushi in my life) and obviously able to afford an $18,000 watch! Well, as we were finishing up, I asked him about his watch, and wouldn’t you know it, he opened right up! So 30 minutes later I have formed a mini friendship with Tony, the owner of the largest web hosting company in Atlanta! I got his contact info and I plan to hound him until he agrees to let me buy him lunch! It’s clear he has expensive taste, so it might cost me $100, but that is a small price to pay to get an hour with a man who built a $280 Million business from the ground up!

I hope this has been helpful to some of you, and I want you to know that my goal with my writing is to engage, equip, and empower other young entrepreneurs. With that in mind, I plan to author a few more posts regarding networking. These will include the details of how I’m meeting 10-15 new people every week and some ideas on how to get over the fears associated with starting conversations with complete strangers! Let me know if this is something you would be interested in, and let me know if there are any other topics you’d like covered! See ya!

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